There are a number of reasons for adopting a child. It certainly is a wonderful opportunity to give a child a loving and caring home. However, there are a few things to consider.
You must have enough capital, including the money for the best family lawyers Essendon locals recommend. Do you have emotional support from friends and family? Do you have extra time on your hands? If you have children, are they all agreed on this new venture?
It’s something not to be taken lightly. The responsibility is huge, and not everyone is suited for adoption. Read on to help you prepare for the road ahead.
1. The Finances
The fees for adopting a child are considerable. Often you have to pay for all the tests, medical expenses, court costs, and legal fees. Quite apart from the governmental levies or fees and social work or psychologist fees, there’s a lot to cover.
You also have to take into account the extra costs of living when a child comes into your home. Factor in clothing, medical expenses, school-related funds, food, holidays and insurance, to merely start the list. You would pay about $170 per week for young pre-teens, and a little more for babies. So, make sure your salary can cover it all.
2. Your Reasons for Adopting
You may have good reasons for adopting or not-so-good reasons. Good reasons include wanting to provide a child with a loving home. Less positive reasons include the need to feel fulfilled, or the need to fix something broken in your long-term life partnership or marriage.
Another poor reason is wanting to rescue a child from a situation such as poverty—especially without considering the challenges that will inevitably come with that scenario.
3. Types of Adoption
There are a number of types of adoption: open adoption and closed adoption; public or private; and international or local.
Open adoption means that the birth mother or birth parents are in contact with you, and able to receive photos and updates or more, depending on your arrangement. In a closed adoption, the birth parents don’t know who you are and vice versa. There is no contact. There are good reasons for both, and it may depend on the circumstances which one you’ll prefer.
A public adoption means that you go through the public system, and a private adoption means that you use a private agency. The latter will be more expensive but may help to expedite the process. It will mean that you will need the best lawyers Essendon residents can hire, but it’s not impossible.
4. The Type of Child
You don’t necessarily have complete say over the race and gender of the child you will adopt, but it will be taken into consideration. You may feel that you really want a little girl, and be able to give good reasons, but it can’t always be guaranteed.
What is taken into account is what age child you wish to adopt. If you want to adopt a baby, then you’ll be taking on a lot of crying and helplessness. If you want to adopt a teenager who has just lost their parents, then you’ll be facing grief and loss issues. You may also prefer to adopt a special-needs child. There are people who can cope with this, but it’s certainly not very easy. Make sure your partner is fully on board with this as well, otherwise resentment might arise.
5. Facing Prejudices
When you adopt and there’s a chance of your child being from a different race or culture. Make sure of your own prejudices and feelings, but also assess your own family’s attitudes in this regard.
Also, how will you teach your child to face any potential racial prejudice from others? Figuring out where they belong is a very important aspect of their upbringing, and they need to know you support them all the way.
6. Questions of Bonding
How will you bond with your child? This question is valid. Unfortunately, not all children and adoptive parents bond. If children are older, you will often have to face a series of bad behaviors while they show their opinion of this change in their lives. You will need to overcome a lot before bonding. Commitment is key here.
In young babies, you’ll be taught techniques of bonding, like skin-to-skin contact or using prolonged eye contact.
Whatever happens, you’ll have the support of social services who are experienced and can give you advice.
Further Thoughts
If you’re seriously considering adopting a child and giving it a loving future, you’ll be doing good in the world. It can be rewarding, but there is a myriad of issues to consider and overcome. It’s vital that you think everything through very carefully and get lots of professional, objective advice before starting.
