The 411 on College and Life Around Campus
VIDEO & SINGLE PREMIERE: Derek Louis // "I Wouldn't Trade"
[Review]: 'Beautiful Boy' is a Sensationalized and...
ALBUM PREMIERE: HOUSTON KENDRICK, PINK Mixtape
Is American Horror Story On Its Way Out?
July 2018 Playlist: The Top 65 Tunes of the Month
5 Cities to Visit While Studying Abroad in Valencia, Spain
Cast of 'Guardians of The Galaxy' Release Statement...
Sweater Beats Releases New Single "Enemy" Featuring Sorana: Watch
Artist Spotlight: Chloe Lilac Releases Mellow Record...
Christian Kuya Shows What the Top "Feel Like" in New...
[Exclusive Interview]: Summer Days with Hit-Makers A R I Z O N A
The College Student's Guide to Poshmark
Natty Reeves Unveils 'Siren' EP, Talks Inspiration,...
Sam Stan Returns With "Outta My League" Music Video: Watch
Notifi Returns With New Track, "Won't Get Lonely": Listen
Demi Lovato's Struggle With Addiction
The Internet Release New Album, 'Hive Mind': Listen
Premiere: Primoz Get the Party Started "Over &...
8 Years of One Direction and We Still Haven't Moved On
Watch Ciara Show Off Her Notorious Dance Moves in...
Rap Sensation DEVMO Just 'Change My Mind' With New EP: Listen
Ben Dragon Sends Kids on Paper Chase For Music Video...
BZZY is Back with New Track, "Firefly": Listen
[Exclusive]: Interview with KINGDM, Shares His...
6 Things to Do While Visiting Australia
Watch the First Official Trailer For DC's 'Shazam!'
Brand'Nu Has Love in His "Pocket" in New Music Video: Watch
Local Artists Rejoice: Spotify Launches New Feature...
Unlimited Gravity Makes a Scene with New Video For...
'Three Identical Strangers' is an Equal Parts...
The room was dimly lit with Christmas lights over the windows. One of us sat on the floor, one of us sat on a stool, and the other two of us sat on a bed. We had been talking like this for hours. About everything. Grades, friends, sports, our families. We were talking about a boy we all knew. How he was maybe a little bit standoffish―he always pulled away when you really started becoming friends. How he was always really kind of an asshole, which was easy to interpret as some sort of flirting. But then, one of the girls alluded to the fact that their friendship was always a bit weird after ‘what he did’ to one of the other girls and to her.
Naturally, I was curious. What had happened?
He was drunk and so was she. It was late and he did not want to walk home drunk all alone. They were good friends and so were he and her roommate. So he slept over.
What’s important is how the next girl started her story.
She and the same boy were at a party together. They were good friends and were both very drunk and tired. So, they walked home together. She offered for him to sleep in her room. Her roommate was not home and he could sleep in her roommates bed. His room was quite a walk further from her dorm. She was trying to be a good friend. He insisted on sleeping in her bed with her.
They were good friends. So, he invited her to his date party. She said yes, why wouldn’t she? They came back to her dorm. The difference in this story is that this girl knows as much as you do now. She offered him a sleeping bag but he refused. He wanted to sleep in her bed.
It is important to know that one of these girls confronted this boy on what happened, yet, he adamantly claimed she was wrong. So, maybe he was drunk. Maybe he doesn’t remember.
But, a lack of memory does not excuse one’s actions. And a lack of memory certainly does not permit an adamant denial.
The first girl was interested in confronting him, months later, on what had happened. But she was worried. What if he denied it?
But, who cared if he denied it? She knows what happened and at the very least deserves an apology.
This got me thinking. What is it about girls failing to confront boys about behaviour that is not okay? Even if it isn’t rape or ‘assault’ as you traditionally think of it? Even if he grabs you just a little *too* close? Even if it is just an uncomfortable comment?
Why had my friends let themselves feel uncomfortable, awkward, and out of place? Why had they let this boy continue on with his life as usual while they thought back on everything that had happened numerous times?
I was really confused. But then, I stepped back and realized that I had done the same thing once too. We are all smart girls who know right from wrong and can tell you that this was wrong. But why didn’t they say anything? Why hadn’t I?
Hi, I'm Carly Berry, a sophomore at Boston University.