Don’t say my ex-boyfriend was a loser, because he wasn’t.
Breaking up is hard to do, as the cliche saying goes. When I broke up with my last boyfriend, I lost someone I not only considered my lover, but also my support staff, my partner in crime, and my best friend. He meant so much to me, and now he is is just gone. It’s hard enough to lose someone, but when all of your friends try and make you feel better by degrading him, it hurts so much more. My ex-boyfriend is still important to me, and he represents a part of my life; I don’t want to think of him as a piece of crap.
Its days like this I find myself missing you more than you can imagine.
— Breakup Quotes (@breakupproblems) October 27, 2011
After my ex-boyfriend and I broke up, my friends told or texted me that I can do better, I can be with someone more attractive or smart or “was more my type.” My best friend said he was a loser and I deserved better than him. They said he was “too lazy,” “smoked too much,” “didn’t text me enough,” “toxic.” I hate when people make assumptions of someone whom they barely even knew. My friends pretty much knew him only as my boyfriend. How could they make a judgement on his character? It was almost as if they were assuming something of me as well. It hurt so much, and every time one of my friends does this, it still stings.
He’s special to me, I don’t need to justify that.
Granted, to most of my friends and family, I had never dated anyone who was like my ex. He was not the kind of boy I would usually go for, but at the same time he was so sweet to me and no one has ever cared for me as he did. Our breakup was a mutual decision; we both felt that the other was not as invested as possible. It was so difficult for me to deal with, it still is. I hate to think of him because it just feels like being thrown into a pile of nails. It sucks so much.
I know everyone is just trying to help me get over my ex-boyfriend faster and let me get back to being myself, but degrading him doesn’t make me feel better at all. Honestly, if I bring him up, I’d rather the response not be “he’s a dick; it’s a good thing you got out of that relationship.” Just let me talk. Let me say what’s on my mind. I don’t need someone else to tell me what my relationship was or wasn’t.
My ex is a key part of my past. He’s someone who made me feel secure in myself and my dreams. I don’t want our good memories clouded by the decently, nasty comments people tell me about him. I want to remember what we were for just that. He wasn’t a mistake and I don’t regret anything about my relationship. My friends shouldn’t be making me feel like I should be. I’ll get over him at my own pace.